One-Hundred-and-One Reasons to Half-Ass Your Hallowe’en Costume

A helpful guide, although slightly less helpful than ’50 Ways to Leave Your Lover.’

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I happen to love my family, which places me in a rather small minority of Americans, so I don’t dread the holiday season, but I do find it stressful and expensive.

There is a strong neurotic strain in the American mind that always wants to put on a show of how much fun is being had, even if the show of fun detracts from the experience of it.  Discovering new enjoyable things isn’t any help, because after a while they will end up part of the show.

It is no secret that I am fond of one particular holiday: I wrote the book on it. And so,  I say let’s take  a stand on Hallowe’en and scale it back. Let’s keep it fun. Let’s half-ass our costumes.  Let’s throw the party on the cheap.  It is a day of masks so why be competitive and exhibitionistic?

Everything in life cannot be one crazed rush to show off.  Anyone worthy of being impressed won’t be, and you, Gentle Reader, will chase the enjoyment of life off into the dark October night.